Quick Answer
Postpartum therapy is a supportive space where new parents can talk openly about depression, anxiety, intrusive thoughts, identity changes, relationship stress, birth experiences, and the challenges of adjusting to life with a baby.
Your first sessions will typically focus on what you have been experiencing, how your symptoms are affecting daily life, and what you hope to get from therapy. You do not need to have a diagnosis or know exactly what is wrong before reaching out for support.
Key Takeaways
- You do not need a postpartum depression diagnosis to begin therapy.
- Postpartum therapy can address depression, anxiety, intrusive thoughts, overwhelm, identity changes, relationship stress, and other concerns.
- Your therapist will work to understand your individual experience rather than assume every new parent has the same needs.
- Therapy may include coping strategies, emotional processing, changing unhelpful thought patterns, and developing realistic expectations.
- Online postpartum therapy can make getting support easier while caring for a new baby.
- Reproductive Mental Health & Wellness provides online postpartum therapy for clients throughout California.
What Is Postpartum Therapy?
Postpartum therapy is mental health support focused on the emotional and psychological challenges that can happen after having a baby.
The postpartum period can involve significant changes in your body, sleep, relationships, responsibilities, routines, and sense of identity.
Even when having a baby is something you deeply wanted, adjusting to parenthood can be difficult.
You might love your baby while also feeling exhausted.
You might feel grateful while also grieving parts of your previous life.
You might look like you are handling everything well while privately struggling with anxiety, sadness, guilt, anger, or emotional numbness.
Postpartum therapy gives you a place to talk honestly about those experiences without needing to pretend that everything is fine.
What Happens During the First Postpartum Therapy Session?
The first session is generally an opportunity for your therapist to learn more about you and what brought you to therapy.
You may discuss topics such as:
- How you have been feeling since having your baby
- Your pregnancy and birth experience
- Changes in your mood
- Anxiety or excessive worry
- Sleep difficulties
- Your relationship with your baby
- Your relationship with your partner
- Your support system
- Previous mental health concerns
- Intrusive or unwanted thoughts
- Changes in your identity
- Stress related to returning to work
- What you would like to change or improve
You do not need to prepare a perfect explanation of how you feel.
Many new parents begin therapy by simply saying something like, “I don’t feel like myself.”
That is enough of a place to start.
Do I Need to Have Postpartum Depression to Go to Therapy?
No.
You do not need a formal diagnosis of postpartum depression to benefit from postpartum therapy.
Some parents seek therapy because they feel anxious. Others may be irritable, overwhelmed, emotionally numb, disconnected, or unable to stop worrying.
You may also simply feel that the transition into parenthood has been harder than you expected.
If you are wondering whether your symptoms may be a reason to seek professional support, read our guide about when to seek therapy for postpartum depression
What Can You Talk About in Postpartum Therapy?
Almost anything affecting your emotional well-being during the postpartum period can be discussed in therapy.
There is no single “correct” postpartum experience.
Postpartum Depression
Postpartum depression can involve sadness, hopelessness, guilt, difficulty enjoying life, emotional numbness, irritability, exhaustion, difficulty concentrating, or feeling disconnected from yourself.
Some parents with postpartum depression are still able to work, care for their children, and complete daily responsibilities.
That can make it harder for them or the people around them to recognize how much they are struggling.
Postpartum Anxiety
For some parents, anxiety is more noticeable than depression.
You might constantly worry about your baby’s health or safety.
You may repeatedly check whether your baby is breathing, have difficulty sleeping because you feel you need to remain alert, or feel unable to relax when someone else cares for your baby.
If you are unsure whether your anxiety is typical new-parent worry, this article explains postpartum anxiety vs. normal worry
Intrusive Thoughts
Some new parents experience unwanted thoughts or mental images involving something frightening happening to their baby.
These thoughts can feel upsetting precisely because they are unwanted.
Parents may feel ashamed to discuss them because they worry that having a frightening thought says something about who they are.
Therapy can provide a place to discuss these experiences rather than keeping them hidden.
Learn more about intrusive thoughts after birth
Postpartum OCD
Intrusive thoughts can sometimes occur as part of postpartum OCD, particularly when they are accompanied by compulsions such as repeated checking, reassurance seeking, avoidance, or mentally reviewing situations over and over.
Postpartum OCD and postpartum anxiety can overlap, but they are not exactly the same.
We explain the differences in:
Postpartum OCD vs. Postpartum Anxiety
Birth Trauma
A difficult, frightening, unexpected, or medically complicated birth can also affect emotional well-being after delivery.
Some parents replay parts of the birth, avoid reminders of what happened, feel constantly on alert, or struggle with fear, anger, grief, or a loss of control.
These experiences can also be discussed in postpartum therapy.
Identity Changes
Becoming a parent can change the way you see yourself.
You may love being a parent while simultaneously missing your previous routines, independence, career identity, relationships, or sense of freedom.
Those feelings do not necessarily mean you regret becoming a parent.
They can simply be part of adjusting to a major life transition.
Read more about losing your identity after becoming a parent
What Does a Postpartum Therapist Actually Do?
Postpartum therapy is not simply an hour of talking about what went wrong during your week.
Your therapist can help you better understand your emotions, identify patterns that may be making symptoms more difficult, and develop strategies for managing what you are experiencing.
Depending on your individual needs, therapy may focus on:
- Understanding anxiety or depression
- Identifying triggers
- Developing coping strategies
- Challenging unrealistic expectations
- Addressing guilt or self-criticism
- Processing a difficult pregnancy or birth
- Managing intrusive thoughts
- Adjusting to changes in identity
- Improving communication with a partner
- Setting healthier boundaries
- Finding ways to ask for and accept help
- Developing more realistic expectations around parenting
The specific approach should depend on your symptoms, goals, history, and individual circumstances.
Will a Therapist Judge Me for What I’m Thinking?
Fear of being judged can prevent new parents from talking openly about how they feel.
This can be especially true when someone is experiencing intrusive thoughts, anger, resentment, regret, difficulty bonding, or thoughts that do not match how they expected parenthood to feel.
A therapist experienced in reproductive and postpartum mental health understands that the postpartum period can involve complicated emotions.
Therapy should provide a space where you can discuss difficult experiences honestly.
What If I Cry During Therapy?
Crying during therapy is completely okay.
You also do not have to cry for therapy to be meaningful.
Some people cry easily when discussing their postpartum experience. Others feel numb, uncomfortable, detached, or unsure what they are feeling.
There is no right way to respond emotionally during a therapy session.
What If I Don’t Feel Connected to My Baby?
Difficulty feeling connected to your baby can be especially painful when you expected bonding to happen immediately.
For some parents, bonding develops gradually.
Depression, anxiety, sleep deprivation, birth trauma, feeding challenges, physical recovery, and the stress of adjusting to parenthood can all make the postpartum period feel different from what you imagined.
Therapy can give you a place to discuss these feelings without treating them as a reflection of your worth as a parent.
Can My Partner Be Part of Postpartum Therapy?
The role of a partner will depend on the type of therapy you are receiving and your individual treatment plan.
Even when therapy is focused primarily on the postpartum parent, relationship changes often become part of the conversation.
Having a baby can change communication, intimacy, household responsibilities, sleep schedules, and expectations between partners.
Partners may also struggle to understand postpartum anxiety or depression and may not know how to help.
For additional guidance, read:
How to Support a Partner With Postpartum Anxiety
How Long Does Postpartum Therapy Take?
There is no universal timeline for postpartum therapy.
Some parents seek short-term support for a specific concern, while others benefit from therapy over a longer period.
The length of therapy can depend on:
- The symptoms you are experiencing
- How long symptoms have been present
- Previous mental health experiences
- Current stressors
- Your support system
- Your treatment goals
- Whether other conditions are present
Your therapist can discuss your goals with you and help determine an appropriate treatment plan.
Can Postpartum Therapy Be Done Online?
Yes. For many new parents, online therapy can make receiving support more manageable.
Leaving home with a newborn can involve feeding schedules, naps, childcare, physical recovery, transportation, and other challenges.
Teletherapy allows eligible clients to attend appointments from home rather than traveling to an office.
This can be especially helpful during a stage of life when finding time for your own needs may already feel difficult.
Reproductive Mental Health & Wellness provides teletherapy to clients throughout California.
When Postpartum Symptoms Need Immediate Attention
Postpartum depression, anxiety, OCD, intrusive thoughts, and postpartum psychosis are not interchangeable conditions.
Postpartum psychosis is a rare but serious psychiatric emergency that can involve hallucinations, delusions, severe confusion, disorganized thinking or behavior, and difficulty distinguishing what is real.
If you or someone you know is experiencing symptoms involving loss of contact with reality, or there is an immediate concern about the safety of the parent or baby, seek emergency medical care.
For more information about this important distinction, read:
Postpartum Psychosis vs. Intrusive Thoughts: Understanding the Difference
Finding Postpartum Therapy in California
You do not have to wait until you are in crisis to ask for help.
Postpartum therapy may be appropriate if you are struggling with depression, anxiety, intrusive thoughts, identity changes, birth trauma, relationship stress, or simply feeling overwhelmed by the transition into parenthood.
At Reproductive Mental Health & Wellness, we provide specialized mental health support for the reproductive and postpartum stages of life.
If you are looking for support, learn more about our Postpartum Depression & Anxiety Therapy services and how we help parents throughout California navigate postpartum mental health concerns.
Frequently Asked Questions
What happens at your first postpartum therapy appointment?
Your first appointment generally focuses on getting to know you, understanding what you have been experiencing, discussing your symptoms and concerns, and identifying what you hope to gain from therapy.
Do I need postpartum depression to see a postpartum therapist?
No. Postpartum therapy can support people experiencing anxiety, intrusive thoughts, identity changes, birth trauma, relationship stress, emotional overwhelm, depression, and other challenges after having a baby.
What do you talk about in postpartum therapy?
You can discuss depression, anxiety, your birth experience, intrusive thoughts, relationships, bonding, identity changes, parenting stress, returning to work, or other concerns affecting your emotional well-being.
Can postpartum therapy help with anxiety?
Postpartum therapy can address anxiety, including persistent worry, racing thoughts, difficulty relaxing, panic, fears about the baby’s safety, and other anxiety symptoms.
Can postpartum therapy be online?
Yes. Reproductive Mental Health & Wellness provides teletherapy for clients throughout California, which allows eligible new parents to receive postpartum mental health support from home.
How do I know if I should see a postpartum therapist?
Consider reaching out if emotional symptoms are persistent, distressing, interfering with daily life, or simply making you feel that you need additional support. You do not need to wait until your symptoms become severe.